Triangle Of Bullying: The Bully, Victim And You

BullyBullying has been talked about for such a long time now that I feel the issue is exhausted, at least from the angle of the bully and the victim. The one sided story of this horrible deed has not been tackled is the bystanders side.

Most might think that bullying is about the victim and the bully, that is correct to a certain degree but the bystanders are also affected by this act as much as the two parts involved.

The bystander is beening affected as much as the direct victim, because she/he witnesses the perpetuator/s inciting the violence on the victim.

Most bystanders just sit or stand around and helplessly watch the bully violate the victim they don’t intervene nor report the incident after it has happened not because they are cruel but because they are afraid of what might happen to them if they dare try to stand up on the bully.

The bystander’s first reaction when confronted about why they do not/ did not intervene on the bullying, their first answer is, “no I didn’t want to get involved, they going to do it to me too”.

To make sure that this [bullying] does not happen to them some resolve to reactions that might actually be encouraging the bully, they cheer, make loud noises even say words that might encourage the bad bully to further abuse.

Though most bystanders don’t because they fear being victimized, retribution, some don’t want to draw attention to themselves , some feel its none of their business and some think that they do not have power to stop the bullying.

The guilt of not trying to stop the bullying can and does affect the bystanders negatively, that’s why they also need to be warned about being the silent bystanders and be told that they should not be afraid to report bullying to adults. Assure children that adults will protect them from the bully/s if they stop bullying and report it.

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